The Index Finger

Going through my Facebook feed and Whatsapp status’ I thought if any of the people who has posted father’s day status for their father, has really wished their father on call or message. I have never wished my father on father’s day. First time I did was last year, and he replied “God bless you”, which was obviously an unexpected reply.

Generally, kids are not open to their father when it comes to having a casual conversation. I was the same until I was encountered a poem Father to Son written by Elizabeth Jennings. Mr Rajendra Mahe was my English teacher at that time. He used to discuss every story and its practical significance with the whole class and students also used to give equal inputs in the efforts made by the Mahe sir.

The day he discussed this poetry in the class, he said that father and son don’t talk much as the son grows. I argued that it can’t be true in all cases. He said it is a universal truth. It struck me. The first thing I did after going home that day was I asked my father about his day at school. From that day I still ask him about his day. Where most people can talk to their father about 1-4 minutes I can talk to him for 10-15 mins daily. He is really an inspiration for me after he has been through and all the things he has done for the family.

Its been a year since I wanted to write this, with the same title The Index Finger. The Index finger of a father is the first support we get in our lives to stand on our feet. Many a time in life we see our mother expressing her emotions to us but a father rarely shows his emotions in any situation. Even the social status of men doesn’t allow them the express their side. Men are never taught to express their emotions.

In this scenario, we can’t expect a father to be emotional. Sadly that is also a major reason for more men suffering from depression and anxiety. Because they will be called weak. Instead of being understood, they are misjudged that makes them keep suffering. That has to be changed. Our generation has been a rebel to many social practices and trends. Let us see what do we do for our father.

I am going to a father someday. If you are a guy you will be a father too. The negligence that our fathers are facing from us, we will also face from our kids. We will not have anyone to talk. We will be alone.

Recently I was watching a web-series Little Things on Netflix. There was a scene where a character was talking about a website which calculates the average no of days you will spend with your parents in a year in the rest of your life. The results were quite heart-breaking. I said heart-breaking because these results are true for almost all of us. We all have spent the first 20 years of our life with our parents. Now on average, we go home for at most 30 days i.e. a month in a year. If I calculate for the next 40 years then we will spend 40 months i.e. 3-1/2 year of the rest of our life with our parents.

I hesitate to call my wish such days. I can talk to him over almost anything. We talk about almost everything. But I still hesitate to wish him fathers day. Thanks to India-Pakistan match today he sent a father-son joke and I wished him behind the curtains of the joke. I hope you too have wished your father personally instead of wishing him on social media where he can’t see your post.